G`day! Me name`s Bodacious Barry but me mates call me Bazza. You`re not one a`me mates, though, so you gotta call me Bodacious Barry, aight?`

　　Neckbrace groaned. Not only had she been kidnapped once again, but this time she had been kidnapped by this& person. Bodacious Barry looked exactly as you would expect him to look. And smelled just as bad. Neckbrace sat up in her cramped prison cell, feeling the weight of the future-alloy collar around her neck. She had been so close to Venus. If only she hadn`t flown into that space-whaling net, everything would have been fine. Barry stood beyond the cell bars, a beer in his hand. You`re one of them vampire buggers, yeah?`

　　Neckbrace nodded. She was indescribably hungry.

　　Barry scratched his neck. You wouldn`t happen to know of this Heartburn bloke would ya?` he asked.

　　Never heard of him,` Neckbrace rasped.

　　Ah, shame. I nicked one of his chips when I was last on Earth and I think he`s still pissed. I would be, too, if I`m being totally honest.`

　　What are you gonna do with me?` Neckbrace asked.

　　I dunno, eat ya?` Barry said.

　　Neckbrace stared at him, and Bodacious Barry exploded into laughter.

　　Damo!` he called out. You gotta see this, mate!`

　　Damo, who looked exactly as you would expect him to, sauntered over. What`s goin` on, Bazza?` he asked.

　　Barry was almost choking with laughter. Told the vampire chick I would eat er, and she made this& Do the face again!`

　　Neckbrace stared at him.

　　Barry and Damo were virtually rolling on the floor. Barry wiped a tear from his eye. Don`t worry, though, we aren`t actually gonna eat ya. We`ll just sell ya somewhere.`

　　Neckbrace stared at him.

　　Classic,` said Barry. He elbowed Damo. Hey, go get Jim. He`s gotta see the face.`

　　Neckbrace didn`t know what it was about her face that was so funny.

　　Barry started ruffling around in his jean pockets. Hey, ya know what?`

　　What?` asked Neckbrace.If you stumble upon this narrative on Amazon, be aware that it has been stolen from Royal Road. Please report it.

　　You`re part of the crew now!` Barry unlocked the cell`s door and let it swing open. Welcome to the Ice Bag Gang!`

　　Neckbrace was still very confused as she sat in the canteen of Bodacious Barry`s ship (which she had learned was called The BB Gun). Did Barry just recruit all prisoners he captured, or was it because of Neckbrace`s allegedly funny face? Or maybe it was as simple as the fact that she was a vampire. Neckbrace couldn`t tell whether Barry was deceptively incompetent, or just incompetent. She chowed down on her massively expired fish and chips, lost in thought.

　　I get how you`re feeling,` said a familiar voice.

　　Neckbrace turned to her right to see the flaming form of Waterman Monoxide sitting next to her. She spat out her spacemaggot-infested calamari and stared at him.

　　YOU AGAIN?` she cried.

　　Oh, it`s Neckbrace!` said Waterman. Hi, Neckbrace! Didn`t recognize you.`

　　Neckbrace stammered, What& how are you here?`

　　Waterman made some kind of hissing noise that sounded a bit like laughter. Funny story! So your friends Armgirl and Legboy were talking with those government guys, and I was spying on them, cause I`m a creep, but then one of the government guys said he was going to blow up the Sun! Now, it`s not like I was born on the Sun or anything, because I`m a totally normal human born on Earth, but I do, coincidentally, have a lot of friends who were born on the Sun, so it`s in my best interest if the Sun were to not be blown up.`

　　Neckbrace took another bite of her food. Uh huh.`

　　Waterman continued. So, I thought to myself Ah, gotta stop this, right? So then I went touring around the Solar System for a while, looking for other people with a generally positive opinion of the Sun, then I met Bazza and he was like Oi mate wanna help me rob some people? and I was like Sure, but can you help me save the sun from being blown up while we`re at it? and he was like Why? We got centralized heating here, mate. Won`t bother us if the Sun goes boom and I was like That`s a pretty defeatist attitude and he was like You`ve got a good point, mate and I was like That`s very open-minded of you to say so and he was like If you help us rob this ship called The Rainbow, we`ll help ya save the Sun and I was like What`s on this Rainbow ship that you want so bad? and he was like There`s some cool tech we can sell for a heap of cash and I was like That seems reasonable and he was like Yeah and I was like Cool, I`ll help you and he was like Cheers, mate and but then I was really hungry from all that talking so I went to the canteen and then I saw this confused looking girl so I sat beside her and then I saw it was you and then I started telling you this story and that`s the end of the story.`

　　&Uh huh,` said Neckbrace.

　　So, whaddaya say?` asked Waterman.

　　&About what?`

　　You gonna help Bazza rob The Rainbow?`

　　Neckbrace growled. I`d rather just go back to Venus, like I`ve been trying to do for FIFTEEN FREAKIN` CHAPTERS!`

　　Then I guess we got ourselves a mutually beneficially transaction, eh?` said Barry, taking a seat across from Neckbrace with a tray of slightly less spoiled fish and chips in his hands.

　　What are you suggesting?` asked Neckbrace.

　　I`m sayin` you should help us rob The Rainbow, and then we`ll take that collar off ya and you`ll be free to go back to Mars or whatever, yeah?`

　　Neckbrace groaned. She really, really just wanted to go home. Fine,` she said. How long till we rob this place?`

　　Barry checked his watch. About thirty seconds, I reckon.`

　　The flickering lights of the canteen began flashing red and a klaxon alarm rang over the speaker system.

　　Looks like I was thirty seconds off,` said Barry.