Home Genre comedy THE GIRL WHO FELL IN THROUGH THE HOLE AT THE END OF THE WORLD

  Elizabeth hit the ground with a heavy thud. Her entire body jangled. Bolts of electricity scurried along her legs like mice that were stuck in a drainpipe.

  Slowly and breathlessly she climbed back onto her feet. The hole that she had fallen through was hovering above her head, the light glimmering as the rays of a silver sun.

  And then, it was gone.

  It felt like the closing of an eye. The eye of the only thing that knew she was even there.

  Although she had no idea where there actually was.

  On all sides she was surrounded by a forest of tall and spiky black trees. A sprinkling of stars were sleeping between the branches and the earth beneath her toes was rock hard and dusted with feathery snow. She gawped at the frozen, silent world with dumb round, dinner plate eyes.

  It was obvious that this was all part of the nightmare, but it was a part that she had never seen before. Rather unnervingly, it also felt very real.

  So there she stood, feeling lost, alone and afraid, clutching her pyjamas, watching the frosty patterns of her breath.

  "Mum?" she called, with the loudest sound she dared to make.

  But there was no reply, just the soft whispering of treetops.

  Louder this time. "Mum? Mum, where are you?"

  A long and harrowing howl turned all the blood in her veins to ice. She whirled around, crunching footprints, gripped by an urge to run.

  But run to where?

  "This is stupid", she told herself, hurriedly. "It`s only a dream. Nothing bad can actually happen, because if it does then Doctor Colohan says that you just wake up. There`s no need to be scared of anything. And it`s all happening in my head, so I`m the one in charge".

  And then a scuffle.

  The crackle of twigs.

  Movement in and amongst the trees.

  Elizabeth`s eyes strained hard into the darkness. There was something there, she could feel it.

  "What do you want?" she demanded, hoping to sound assertive.

  There was another snap . . . and a moment later Elizabeth was confronted by the most peculiar sight.

  A swarthy man in stone grey furs, with black scraggly hair and the messiest beard ever came stomping out of the forest. Elizabeth`s first impression was that he looked like a cross between a barbarian and a Viking, all the way down to his great big hairy boots.

  He also seemed to be rather out of sorts.

  The man stopped as soon as he saw her, bent over, sucked in a bucketful of air, puffed heavily, stood up as straight as he could, puffed heavily again and drew a broadsword from a beaten leather scabbard. He moved slowly in her direction, encircling her with the blade held out before him.

  Elizabeth clenched her teeth and fists in fear. "Who are you?" she found the courage to say.

  "I should be asking you the same thing". The man`s full chestnut eyes were fixed completely on hers. "What would a young wee lassie be doing in a dangerous place like this?"

  Remember, it`s my dream, Elizabeth thought.Unauthorized use of content: if you find this story on Amazon, report the violation.

  "I asked first", she said.

  "And what difference does that make?"

  "It`s just the way it works. You`re in my head and it`s my imagination so that means you have to tell me".

  "Says who?"

  "Says me".

  "Aye, but I dinnae know who you are because you havenae answered my question!"

  Elizabeth decided that, given the circumstances, it might be best not to cause any trouble. "All right", she conceded, and now in a bit of a huff, "I`ll tell you my name if you promise to tell me yours".

  "Agreed", agreed the Viking.

  "I`m Elizabeth Harding", Elizabeth Harding said.

  The hairy grizzle-heap squinted over a lumpy, potato-shaped nose. "And are you dangerous Elizabeth?"

  She screwed up her face at the sheer absurdity of the question. "Are you?"

  "I asked first".

  "And what difference does that make?"

  A beaten sigh. "All right. Keep your head on. You cannae be too careful. And it doesnae hurt to ask".

  Elizabeth clamped her hands to her hips. "You said you`d tell me your name?"

  "Aye, that I did". The Viking rummaged through his thick, unruly facebush. "But let`s just say that most people call me - "

  "Aelgren - there you are!"

  Elizabeth and the Viking leapt up in the air and twirled about together as if performing a synchronised dance routine. When Elizabeth came back down she saw wandering through the trees a tall man wrapped in purple robes and a girl with long white hair. The man, who seemed to be some kind of monk, walked with a bone-coloured staff and an aura of perfect calm.

  The girl, on the other hand, with her dented top hat and scuffed leathery boots, looked like she had fallen out of a poster reading: WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE`.

  "We were wondering where you had got to", she snapped, lowering her crossbow.

  The Viking (whom Elizabeth now supposed to be called Aelgren) stuck out his chest and grinned. "I told you I`d find her first!"

  "Yes", said the monk, with a voice like honey, "and I hope you haven`t sat on her". He turned to Elizabeth, making a face of concern. "He hasn`t sat on you, has he?"

  "No", replied Elizabeth, giving an innocent shake of her head.

  "Any broken bones?"

  "I don`t think so".

  "And he hasn`t dropped you in anything?"

  "Not that I know of".

  "Good", remarked the girl, who might have been an outlaw. "There`s no time for your messing about".

  Another mournful, menacing howl split the night asunder.

  "Wolfhogs", muttered the man in the purple robes. "I have a very strong feeling that we really ought to move".

  Elizabeth folded her arms and dug her heels into the snow. "I`m not going anywhere", she said. "I have no idea who any of you are. So I`m staying put until I wake up".

  "I really don`t think you should", advised the monk, peering anxiously into the trees.

  "And why not?"

  "Because Wolfhogs are very fierce and they have teeth as big as your fist".

  "Still not moving", said Elizabeth, wiggling her fingers while trying not to look down at her hand.

  Aelgren produced a doleful shrug. "Ach well, we gave it a try".

  He turned about and began to plod back into the forest.

  "Aelgren", shot the girl, reprovingly. "We can`t just leave her. You know she`ll be eaten alive!"

  "Better her than me".

  The frosty bandit skipped several paces, snatching hold of the Viking`s arm. "What did we agree that you were going to try and work on?"

  Aelgren looked down at his feet, mumbling something under his breath.

  "I can`t hear you", trilled the girl.

  "Being nicer to strangers", the Viking said, in a flat and weary way.

  "Very good", the girl agreed. "So what do we need to do now?"

  "Nae let the young wee lassie get herself eaten by Wolfhogs?"

  "That`s right". Sharp, albino-pink eyes slid across to where Elizabeth was still standing with her arms strapped over her chest. "And how can we make sure something like that doesn`t happen?"

  Aelgren grunted, scratched his beard, puffed his cheeks and grinned . . . and the next thing that Elizabeth knew she was being flung raggedly over his shoulder.

  "Put me down!" she yelled, thumping her fists and kicking her feet frantically into the air. "Let me go!"

  But it was a futile, niggling protest. After several minutes of thrashing about Elizabeth concluded that it was better to give up the ghost, letting her limbs go as floppy as rabbit`s ears, swaying back and forth as the Viking trudged through the tangle of trees.

  The monk led the way, stopping only when they got to the boulder that looked like a giant shoe. Measuring a series of strides from the smoothest, shallowest end, the man knelt down and scraped aside a pile of twigs and stones. Together with Aelgren he pulled open a deviously well-disguised hatch.

  Sensing that her number of options was exactly equal to zero, Elizabeth followed the girl inside, climbing down the rusty ladder into the depths of the earth below. She had not gone far when she heard the thunk of the hatch being bolted shut behind them.

  At the bottom of the shaft was a small and rough-cut circular chamber. The instant they set foot in it a series of softly glowing gas lamps poofed into life above their heads.

  "This way", said the girl, darting off into the mouth of a narrow tunnel.

  Elizabeth scurried after her, feeling more and more like a frozen mole with every passing step.

  And as she went she had the inescapable sensation that nothing, after this, was going to be quite the same again.

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