Hey, author here. Thought I`d have the voices in my head cast of Everybody Loves Large Chests join me in wishing everyone a happy new year, so I asked many of them to write a few words!

　　Hello, delicious morsel. Would you like your new year to be tasty and/or shiny? If so, feel free to jump into my mouth. It`s a magical portal to a happy place, I promise.-Boxxy T. Morningwood

　　I like to think the new year replaces the old one by whipping it until it passes out. I know it`s not like that, I just like to think about it.-Master`s Best Snack

　　You go out there and you punch that new year in the face! Teach the motherfucker who`s boss from the get go!-Koralenteprix Khusuuszun Caonthioxxaa

　　Tktktktkt& I hope your next year has exactly as many stabbings in it as you want it to have.-Drea

　　If you know what`s good for you, you`ll keep a close eye on me in the coming year.-Fizzy

　　Happy new year everyone! Lots of happiness and success!-Plus

　　Great, another shitty year of playing backup dancer to a fucking box.-Minus

　　A singular year is meaningless in the ceaseless march of time.-Null

　　A few words.-Jen

　　Good fortune to all, and to all a good year.-Ambrosia

　　What do you mean a new year? Is the old one, like, broken or something?-Lavender

　　Happy new year, and stay safe out there!-Keira

　　I wish everyone out there much love and happiness in the coming year.-Rowana

　　Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip! Yip!-Minic

　　Snek. Sneksnek, snkekek. Snek.-Snek

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　　Feeling lonely on this New Year`s Eve? Come to Bitterhold, and you`ll never be lonely again!-The Slimetatorship of Stain

　　Here`s hoping this year`s office party will be a bit more lively.-Carl

　　NAGNAMOR WILL CRUSH YOUR PUNY CELEBRATIONS INTO DUST! NOT EVEN ASHES WILL REMAIN OF YOUR HOPES AND DREAMS!Stolen story; please report.-OVERLORD NAGNAMOR OF THE FLAMING LEGION

　　Like, have a great year, everyone! Remember to vote for me in the next popularity contest!-Ultra=桵agicalPPrincess=QLulu=w

　　This next year shall fall within predicted parameters.-Overlord Weaxohn the All-Knowing

　　What do you mean a few words?` I haven`t even gotten a single line so far! Like, at all! & Ugh, fine! I hope you pathetic losers die while fellating a flamingo or something for all I fucking care! Also, Naggy-Pants is such a giant pussy he gives my own a run for its money!-Overlord Shridiaphrial the Queen Bitch

　　Well, I know someone who`s not getting a raise next year. Well, it`s not like I pay them or anything, but still. Anyway, have a good one, folks, and may you have lots of surprises!-Larry, the God of Happenstance

　　Happy new year, mortals! And remember - if you`re not having fun, you`re probably not doing it right.-Solus, God of Life and Light

　　May all your hopes and dreams bear fruit in this coming year.-Nyrie, Goddess of Nature and Fertility

　　This year, you will strive to be better than you were the year before. You owe it to yourself.-Axel, God of War and Combat

　　Everything is possible if you put the effort in.-Goroth, God of Artisans and Artists

　　I hope you get the chance to visit all those lovely places you couldn`t go to last year.-Zephyra, Goddess of Rain and Travel

　　This next year will be one to remember, I`m sure of it!-Lunar, Goddess of Magic and Learning

　　Don`t forget to pay your taxes.-Mortimer, God of Death and Commerce

　　I hope those of you who are lost will find yourselves in the coming year.-Teresa, Goddess of Truth and Justice

　　Uh& Grab the new year by the balls and& make lemonade from them? Was that how that saying went? Eh, close enough.-Robin

　　I hope everyone has an orgasmically fantastic new year!-Hugs and kisses, Madeline

　　Be excellent to one another, and good things will come.-Lydia

　　This year as well, let`s each of us strive to do what`s right.-Sigmund Law, Hero of the Hammer

　　Gux wishes to declare this the Year of the Worm. Gux is not sure why he wishes this, but he does.-Gux, Hero of Rain

　　I wish all of you an orc-free year.-Hesk, former Hero of the Sword

　　Be careful when visiting relatives for the holidays. Accidents happen, and all that.-Kaede, Hero of Death

　　This year is gonna be a good one! I feel it in my bones!-Orrin, Hero of the Sun

　　Here`s hoping we all learn something new this year. For me, it`ll be whether Sigmund rips my balls off when he finds out I got all three of his girls pregnant, haha!-Nao, Hero of Magic

　　It`s actually a serious concern that keeps him up at night. So yeah, look before you leap, is all I`m saying.-Kuro

　　This is bullshit.-Edward Allen, former Spymaster of the Lodrak Empire

　　What he said.-Aleister, former Blight Lord of Velos

　　Ditto.-Eren, Old God of Destruction