Pak

　　Tok`sera tells me my father resides in one of their larger operating bases, somewhere near a surface woodland. She says he was a military intelligence officer who had spent some time in Iridan under cover, among the nobility. I ask how he got away with being a Du閚 in a city that fears and hates them. She says he was disguised, but won`t disclose the method by which he remained so. It`s classified. I roll my eyes. It was probably just illusory magic.

　　We travel by wagon, pulled by a giant snake with smooth black scales that moves noiselessly across the rock. They keep my hands bound. For all my cooperation, they still won`t give me my autonomy. I am a caged asset, valued only for my utility. But they can`t take the light from me anymore. I have the spoli`s favor.

　　I contemplate what I`ll say when I finally face my father. I have dozens of questions. Dozens of insults. I`ve built up an entire monologue in my head. My chest bubbles with anticipation. My whole body seethes with rage.

　　You`re going to kill him, aren`t you?

　　I wince. Breathe. Don`t respond out loud.

　　(If I have to.)

　　You`ve got to give me more than that.

　　Do you want to?

　　(I`m not-)

　　Don`t say you`re not a murderer.

　　We both know that`s not true.

　　I sigh through my nose, clenching my jaw shut tight. Tok`sera eyes me from the side.

　　(Grandmother was suffering.)

　　And she made you suffer.

　　(That isn`t why I did it.)

　　Sure. Keep telling yourself that.

　　I`m sure you`ll find your father has been suffering`, too.

　　(Why do you care? Who even are you?)

　　Are you serious?This content has been misappropriated from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

　　The voice gives a cold, sinister laugh. My whole head burns.

　　God, you are stupid.

　　Stop being so mean&

　　I flinch as the weak voice chimes in. The one to my right sighs and sucks its teeth.

　　I`m the voice of reason, Pak.

　　I`m you, if you weren`t such a fucking crybaby.

　　(This is ridiculous&)

　　No. This is your reality.

　　You`re so much more powerful than you know.

　　But you keep holding yourself back. Why?

　　Because you`re scared? You don`t want to hurt anyone?

　　Please. Nobody gave you that courtesy.

　　They beat you into the ground. They would have killed you.

　　But you stopped them, didn`t you?

　　With that weapon of yours, you could do anything.

　　Stop fighting it.

　　Don`t listen&

　　Shut up.

　　I`m trembling. Tok`sera is watching me. I want to grip my head, cover my ears, scream at the voices to stop& but I can`t. I stay quiet. I stay still. I hold it all in.

　　You`ll understand when the time comes.

　　(You`re full of shit.)

　　Some things just need to die.

　　(I wish you`d die, already.)

　　Then kill yourself.

　　I fold my arms over my stomach, digging my fingernails into my flesh. Stay quiet. Stay still. Hold it in&

　　It`s your father`s fault that you live this way.

　　It`s his fault that you exist. He`s the source of all your suffering.

　　He killed your mother. He deserves to die.

　　A tear breaks loose.

　　Go ahead. Cry about it for now.

　　But when the time comes&

　　We continue on to the sound of wagon wheels crunching, the snake`s belly hedging a path. My breathing returns to a steady rhythm. I unstick my nails from my skin. Tok`sera looks away. My father`s face blinks into my imagination, a featureless mossy-black elf. I see his eyes flicker with recognition&

　　Thump.

　　Bullseye.