Late afternoon, arriving at Lumeer`s West Gate covered in the dirt of four days on the road. Everyone still present and accounted for, the caravan stocked full of exotic goods from Tasnanca. As well as eighteen of them. Had hit level 14 on the way back.

　　Name: Lucilia Macarthy

　　Profession: Runemage Level: 14

　　Sex: Female

　　Experience: 86,212 (0)

　　Age: 20

　　Until Next: 13,583

　　Health

　　85

　　Mana

　　81

　　Stamina

　　38

　　Spirit

　　8

　　Strength (STR)

　　57 (3)

　　Constitution (CON)

　　64 (7)

　　Dexterity (DEX)

　　69 (14)

　　Agility (AGI)

　　87 (18)

　　Discipline (DIS)

　　77 (13)

　　Aura (AUR)

　　83 (16)

　　Logic (LOG)

　　74 (17)

　　Intuition (INT)

　　77 (18)

　　Wisdom (WIS)

　　47 (-2)

　　Influence (INF)

　　77 (13)

　　Name

　　Trainings

　　Bonus

　　Armor Use

　　6

　　29

　　Physical Fitness

　　15

　　60

　　Simple Weapons

　　15

　　60

　　Arcane Symbols

　　20

　　70

　　Magic Item Use

　　15

　　60

　　Harness Power

　　15

　　60

　　Mana Control

　　15

　　60

　　Runemancy

　　15

　　60

　　Arance Lore, Decomposition

　　2

　　10

　　Arcane Lore, Shaping

　　15

　　60

　　Arcane Lore, Transference

　　5

　　25

　　Survival

　　15

　　60

　　Perception

　　15

　　60

　　Climbing

　　15

　　60

　　Swimming

　　10

　　45

　　First Aid

　　15

　　60

　　Trading

　　15

　　60

　　Stalking and Hiding

　　15

　　60

　　Currently in violation of one of the most principle rules. Always be earning. Couldn`t be helped while on the road, but now, back in town, should get back to building up a buffer.

　　"When we get back to the house," said Daniel, to the group, "be ready to head out in about three hours. And dress nice, we`re going somewhere fancy. My treat. Oh, and Lucy, we need to get your room situation figured out. There should be a few small ones still available."

　　"Anything is better than nothing, I`m sure it`ll be great."

　　Guess building back up a buffer is going to have to wait.

　　Getting back to the house. Nodding my greeting at the statue and following Daniel up the stairs. Magpie coming with.

　　"Going to see if Liz is in, say hello, and then we`ll get you set up," said Daniel. Following him through the house to her office. Daniel knocking. "Come in," said voice from inside. The three of us entering.

　　Elizabeth Conner sitting behind the desk writing something. Another woman in the room looking at some papers. No Roy today. A wolf laying on the floor, scanning each of us.

　　"Daniel," said Conner, with an undercurrent of worry, "did you just get in? How`d the trip back go?"

　　"Just now, Liz. It went fine. No issues and no surprises on the way back."

　　"That`s a huge weight off my shoulders," she said, with evident relief. Looking at Magpie and racking her brain for a second, "Grace, could you do me a favor and get Roy? I need him for a quick debrief with Daniel."

　　"Yes, ma`am," said Magpie, leaving.

　　"How about our new recruit here, how did she manage?"

　　"Lucy is truly an asset to the house. She has my full backing."

　　"That`s good to hear. After your report you`ve got the rest of the day off. And then do whatever you want this whole upcoming cycle. We`ll get you back to your usual duties the next one."

　　"I appreciate it, Liz. Thank you."

　　A few moments later a knock at the door and Roy entering, Magpie and Roy`s cat following from behind.

　　"Grace, Lucy," she said, "you`re dismissed."

　　"Yes, ma`am." "Yes, ma`am," said Magpie. Turning to leave.

　　"Hey Magpie," said Daniel, "can you do me a favor and show Lucy the unoccupied rooms so she can pick one?"

　　"Sure. C`mon Mac."

　　Walking out into the hall, following Magpie.

　　"So none of what`s available is big, and only the corner suites have private baths, but there are a couple communal ones on each floor."

　　The first. Not big, rectangular, the window facing north. Currently being used as storage. The second, slightly larger, but with a jog, the window facing east. The view not managing to reach the ocean. The third, tiny. And the fourth, not much better. Heading back to the second one. The room containing a bed, a desk, a chair, a dresser, and a small closet. Entirely more than adequate.

　　"Where`s your room?"

　　"A couple over from here."

　　"This one`s good."

　　Putting my pack on the floor and draping my cloak on the chair. Definitely not as nice or as large as my former accommodations back at the guild, but having something permanent again, priceless. The window also an added bonus.

　　"I`ll give you the grand tour," said Magpie, "Let`s get something to drink from the kitchen and I`ll introduce you around."

　　Following her back down the stairs, into the common area and entering the dining area.

　　"Lucy," Daniel`s voice calling out behind. "Liz says she wants to do a quick debrief with you right now, see how you managed."

　　"Okay."

　　Glancing at Magpie, her shrugging, and then heading back up to see Conner.

　　"I`ll wait out here," said Magpie.

　　Entering the office. Five sets of eyes on me. Trying to stay calm. Sitting in the hot seat.

　　"Lucy, I thought you`d want to know," said Conner. "A few days ago they finally managed to take care of William Macarthy. This town has been being terrorized since you left. If I recall correctly, you had said you were killed by him at the gala."

　　The three of them trying to look relaxed while simultaneously intently watching me. The wolf and Roy`s cat staring.

　　"Yeah, that`s right."

　　"Did you notice anything strange about him when you saw him at the gala," said the other woman.

　　"...yes. It was one of them. A monster."

　　The woman looking over at the other two. Panic starting to grow.

　　"A couple days ago," said Conner, "the Director called together a special session of the leadership to discuss what had happened."Unauthorized usage: this narrative is on Amazon without the author`s consent. Report any sightings.

　　Shaker, you fucking bastard. You couldn`t just let it be, could you? This whole trip had ended up turning out pretty good. A nice, fresh new start.

　　"He made an incredible accusation. Regarding you, specifically. He claimed that you are, in fact, William Macarthy."

　　Trying to hold it together.

　　"That`s, that is, I don`t know how to respond to that. That sounds pretty crazy."

　　"I agree," said Conner, after a long moment. "The accusation sounds insane. If we were back home, and if what he said was true, he`d probably be brought up on charges. Violation of autonomy, among others."

　　Charges? The Director? Ha. That is not how things work. As if words on paper mean anything more or anything less than the violence required to enforce them. And we`re nowhere near home. Nowhere even close. We`re way, way out here.

　　Conner sighing. "Constance, what do you think?"

　　"I don`t know," said the woman. "That thing I helped hunt down definitely looked like Macarthy, but it was also definitely one of them. And, while its certainly possible that this girl is Macarthy, look at her. The way she`s sitting. The way she walked in here. That gesture she made earlier. Those mannerisms are difficult, if not impossible, to learn. She has no awkwardness. If you shave a dog, dock its ears and tail, and then put it in a dress, its still going to bark, its still going to drool. I don`t see it."

　　"Liz," said Roy, "this is probably the whole house situation all over again. Another lie. We were supposed to be out of here and yet here we still are. And relatively weaker today than then. I don`t think we should go along with it."

　　"Go along with what?" Breaking in to their conversation.

　　"Well," said Conner, "when the Director found out that you were a prospective member in our house he demanded that we revoke your offer of membership and expel you. Persona non grata as far as the houses are concerned. He put it to a vote and enough of the other houses went along with it. Probably out of spite for us." She added, bitterly.

　　"Wait, I`m blacklisted. All the houses?" And all the house leadership in the know.

　　Conner shaking her head. "I`m sorry. If you can wait a bit we`ll appeal the decision at the next scheduled meeting - its only a couple months away - but, for the moment, we can`t have you in our house. I`d understand if, when we get this all sorted out, you don`t wish to return. But I`d be extremely humbled if you did. You have my utmost apologies."

　　An appeal in several months. Ludicrous. And it will never be accepted.

　　"Liz," said Roy, "I don`t agree with this at all. Especially after Daniel`s report."

　　"If she were a full member I`d tell the Director to pound sand. I`d tell all of them where to put their vote. But she isn`t. Again, I`m truly sorry."

　　Their voices being replaced by a low buzz. Talking to each other, back and forth. Couldn`t leave well enough alone, could you Shaker?

　　"Liz, if this is some innocent girl we`re scum for doing this," said Roy. "And if we take what the Director said at face value, if this really is some remorseless killer like William Macarthy, we`d be fools not to have him on our side. What`d they call him back when the Thieves Guild was running their protection rackets? Some scary name. There`s no real reason we can`t just keep her off the books for the time being."

　　Maybe they`ll be amenable. Time for some honesty. Here goes. "Black Hand."

　　At the sound of it Roy stopping short, turning to look at me, the two women as well. A pall descending over the room. No, that didn`t go well.

　　"What did you say?" said Roy.

　　"Black Hand. That`s the name I earned." Standing up. The three of them suddenly looking extraordinarily unsure. "I sincerely appreciate your consideration and I`m truly sorry it didn`t work out. As far as," voice catching, "as far as everyone else, I don`t know, tell them something."

　　"Won`t leave this room." Conner`s voice a whisper.

　　"I had absolutely nothing to do with that thing killing everyone these past few cycles."

　　No reaction, still very unsure.

　　Considering if there was anything else and then dropping a turd.

　　"You need to know, everyone needs to know, the Bonneville made it. All those people died here."

　　At that pronouncement Conner`s eye giving an involuntary twitch. Oh, you knew about that, did you? Seems like there are more conspirators than only the first expedition. Staring her down, forcing her to break eye contact. At least she has the decency to look embarrassed.

　　Turning to leave.

　　"What`s going on?" said Roy.

　　Opening the door. Magpie out in the hall, eyes haunted. She must have been listening in the whole time. Closing the door behind me, leaving me and her face to face.

　　"Mac," she said, starting to tear up, "I didn`t think, I didn`t fully, I didn`t-"

　　Burying her in a crushing hug, "Don`t worry about it." Tears starting to pour out.

　　"What are you going to do," she said, "What should I-"

　　"Magpie, you`ve got a good thing going. Don`t fuck up your life on my account."

　　"What, no, we`re still friends, right?"

　　Totally unable to control it, bawling on her shoulder. Her hugging me back harder.

　　"Of course we`re still friends, don`t be stupid."

　　Walking back with her to what turned out to be my very temporary room. Getting my cloak and pack.

　　"What are you going to do?" she said.

　　Ossen maybe. Get on the boat in a few days and head out to the archipelago. Looking at her distraught face, remembering Riley and Wolfe still waiting for me. No. Not going to be that easy, Shaker. Going to stay.

　　"I`m staying. They`re not getting rid of me that easy. And you`re still going to be coming out with me, at least one day a cycle."

　　"You really want me to?" she said.

　　"Of course. We`re still friends, right?"

　　"Yeah, we are." A smile finally breaking through.

　　"Great, I`ll meet you in front of this dump in two days. Eight in the morning. We`re going underground."

　　"I`ll definitely be there."

　　Bidding farewell and then walking through the house, my bravado slipping away each step. Entirely gone about halfway down the stairs. Have to start moving faster. Always had been on a timer but now everything`s been pushed up. The laughter coming from the thing in the entryway following me out the door.

　　Two steps out and noticing a figure coming toward the house. A figure from a lifetime ago. Holly. No, not going to deal with you now, not after all that. Just keep walking. Her eyes taking me and then passing over, focusing on the house. Almost breathing a sigh of relief and then her gaze snapping back. Blocking my path. Much taller now. Still gorgeous, even when angry.

　　Neither of us saying anything, her glaring, me with nothing to say.

　　"You`re Macarthy." Not responding. "You didn`t keep your promise."

　　"I didn`t-" Starting to respond, but cut off.

　　"You didn`t even try. You went to this place, instead. I went looking for you and this was all I found." Pulling out a pouch and waving it. Drawing my eyes. The bag that had been flushed. "Let me guess, this was all you ever cared about, wasn`t it? Here, you can have what`s yours." Throwing it on the ground in front of me.

　　"Holly, I know I fucked up. A lot`s happened. I`m back now."

　　"You`re back? Are you? Who are you, tell me your name."

　　"William Mac-" Her look of disgust cutting me short, the lie dying on my lips.

　　"That`s not your name. Even you don`t believe it. Tell me, what`s your name."

　　"Lucy."

　　"That`s more like it." Her face covered with a sneer. "Your promises never meant anything to begin with, and I don`t remember promising anything to anyone who looked like you."

　　"Holly-"

　　"If you had come I would have helped." A guilty look crossing her face at her own words. "At least I would have tried." An amendment. The two of us only looking at each other, her features beginning to distort with fury. "You deserve worse than this." Her mouth opening, a phrase of power pouring out, the same as during the meeting with Stormhawk.

　　"Holly, I`m sorry, please don`t-"

　　Dropping into an inky blackness, pressed in on all sides. Trying to figure out what ws going on but then realizing. Unable to breathe. That`s what that is. In the clutches of the thing from deep in the depths, down in the ruins. That Which Lurks Below. Horrible, immense, looming, with jagged teeth and sharp spikes. Something Holly assuredly had never seen, let alone knew of it`s existence. It can`t be real. The thing grabbing my arm, spikes piercing, crushing my bone. Pulling, yanking and then ripping my arm off. Mocking laughter drowning out my agonized scream of pain. Deserve worse deserve worse deserve worse playing like a reverb. The other arm being grabbed, pierced, crushed.

　　What`s this, you dare try to renege? Far too late. The price was already paid. The malignant voice crawling into my head, writhing, full of seething and hate. Lost, unloved Lucilia, you never should have been seen or heard from again. You don`t deserve happiness and you never did. Even misery is too good for a crime like you. You deserve much worse. How dare you try and crawl back. How dare you try and stand in the light of day. You already should have been erased.

　　My other arm being pulled off. Excruciating pain flooding my being but starting to disassociate. My left boot burning. Its not real its not real its not real. Focusing on my foot. My leg being grabbed, being pierced, being crushed. Its not real its not real its not real. Trying to let it be known, trying to convince myself. My vision clearing, back in the world, breaking out of the induced nightmare.

　　Holly taking a few faltering steps back, completely shocked at my recovery. Trying to steady myself, my limbs shaking and weak, reaching for my knife. Holly speaking another phrase of power. Can`t even take a step, will fall flat on my face, this is going to be it. A white fog billowing around her form, covering it completely, then blowing away. Gone. My strength failing and falling to the ground. Gritting my teeth, but laying still, trying to muster the energy to get back up.

　　Pulling myself into a sitting position. Keeping my breathing steady and then scooting over to the bag she`d thrown on the ground. Inside, my gold ring. Holding it between two fingers. Far too large. A heavy man`s ring, not even close to the correct size. Looking back to where Holly had been. You are going to pay dearly for that.

　　Getting to my feet, still unsteady but strength returning. Had been planning on going underground but absolutely no remaining desire to do so. The sun going down. Heading over to the Rat Cellar, renting a room and then getting out my pipe. Getting a good but of the sweet resin. A lot this time, no tobacco. Taking several hits, obliterating everything. All the bad thoughts evaporating, but no good thoughts there to fill the void. Laying on the bed, staring at the ceiling, staring at nothing. Waking up hungry a few hours later, checking the time, slightly past ten.

　　Finding some silver, getting on my boots and heading down the stairs and into the bar. No scar, beard or giant in tonight. Taking a seat at the bar between two ruffians, my feet swinging above the floor. Ordering dinner and a pint and looking around. Somehow ended up back here. Back at rock bottom. Back at this same old shit. Taking a drink, elbows on the bar, propping my head up with one, aimlessly tapping with the other. Staring blankly ahead while waiting for the food to come out.

　　The ruffian next to me glancing over, and then putting his hand on mine.

　　"Hey sweetie, you look pretty down," he said, "I can help cheer you up."

　　Looking at his hand, glancing at him, uncomprehending. He doesn`t see the old me anymore. He`s forgotten completely. Otherwise he`d never do this. Respect would have kept him in line. Or, more likely, fear. Not William Macarthy anymore. But that isn`t all there is to me. Still have my name, the one hard earned. Time to make them remember, make them all remember.

　　Reaching for the knife on my torso. Finding nothing. Glancing down, no sheath, no knife. Forgotten back in the room. Anger at myself dwarfing anything toward him. Fury taking hold. Carve. The world getting soft under my fingers. The ruffian making a surprised sound, suddenly pulling his hand off, dripping blood. Taking a backhand swipe, his arm soft, and in the middle something harder, but going right through. A spray of blood coming from his stump, coating the bar, some of the splatter getting on my face. The entire room stopping, looking at the commotion. My face beginning to hurt. Standing up, my other hand cutting through the wood on the bar. Going to tear right through them.

　　"Ms. Macarthy, stop this at once," the barkeeper yelling behind me.

　　Turning and looking at him. Mustache quivering and an arm outstretched And fear in his eyes. Turning back and looking at the rest of the things in bar. They seem to be remembering now.

　　"You have to leave," he said, "you`re not welcome in this establishment. I`m going to call the watch if you don`t."

　　The watch? For some shitty dive by the docks. Probably kill everyone in here twice over before they even manage to show up. He knows it, too. That`s a nice look.

　　"My apologies," gesturing with my bloody hand, grin wide. "I`ll be on my way."

　　Heading across the room, the way being cleared, my cuffs in tatters from bushing against my wrists. Opening the door with the shield and out into the night. Walking along the street and out toward the docks. A group of toughs, making rude comments aimed me, coming over to harass, but getting closer and seeing my hand, dripping, and my face, and thinking better of it.

　　Had played it pretty smart these past couple cycles. Head down and running like a rabbit. Before then, months spent in hibernation, with only one disastrous foray out. That is all going to end. Taking a breath. Might be getting ahead of myself. Still need to keep playing it smart. But there`s a significant difference between careful and cowardice.

　　Walking along the docks and down an empty pier. Getting to the end, the water lapping against the posts. Hands coming up to my neck. Too easy. The world returning to its normal state. Gotten soft. Averse. Died once in the last nine months, killed by myself. Staying here, pushing though, means dying, not once, or twice, but probably ten or even dozens of times. Can`t win every fight. Bad circumstances. Retreat impossible. The real secret of success? Never stay down, always come back. Looking out over the moonlit bay and then taking the plunge.

　　Slowly breathing out all the air in my lungs, getting pushed and pulled in and out with the tide. Sinking down. Panic starting. No. Endure. This is the price of making stupid mistakes, of leaving your knife in the room. This is a reminder to cut away the excess fat. Lungs empty, burning. Needing air, none to be gotten. Holding to my limit as far as possible, then inhaling seawater, the burning multiplied a thousandfold. Twisting, contorting, fighting my instinct to try and swim to the surface. Losing strength, suffocating. Bit by bit. Now to the side of my body, emotion totally vacant. Pulling the trigger.

　　In the temple, laying on a hard surface. The emotion from the recent death hitting, but blunted, had already experienced everything in those minutes spent drowning. Priestess Vivian coming over with a blanket. Turning my head weakly, no one else here tonight. The judgment from the surrounding statues less overt, the mockery less severe.

　　"Mac," she said, "I know I said I wanted to see you again, but isn`t this pretty soon?"

　　"I just couldn`t stay away, Vivian, I had to see you. Do you mind if I stay here for the night?"

　　Helping me to my feet, letting me lean against her, walking me down to a room with some cots already laid out.

　　"Going to be gone tomorrow but back in at midnight, could you make sure no one moves the cot in the meantime? I hate it when that happens."

　　"I will Mac," she said, then pausing. "You look a lot better than the last time you came."

　　"You may not believe it, but I feel much better."

　　Vivian kneeling next to the cot, my head in her arms. Slowly being rocked to sleep. Getting a kiss on my forehead.

　　"Sweet dreams, Mac."