I wake up bright and early, fully rested, confident for the day ahead, but still not looking forward to it. I declined to mention to Sammy last night that we`d be going through a giant sewer maze today - the less time she has to spend stressing out about it, the better. At least we`re much better prepared with my Ice Blade than I normally would be, though I think we should stock up on a few extra healing items. To assuage Sammy, at the very least.

　　Breakfast is adequate, but unremarkable - whoever decided to serve pancakes without a side of whipped cream deserves to be fired! Or at least mildly reprimanded for dereliction of duty! In any case, the fruit isn`t nearly as good as the strawberries I purchased back in Penne, though it`s still as juicy and sweet as the high-quality organic stuff back home, with magical healing properties to boot.

　　We check out of the hotel around midmorning, only to be greeted by a gentle rumble beneath our feet as we step outside onto the cobblestone streets. Sammy turns to me with a panicked look, her hands quivering, her eyes darting around as the people around us start chattering about the sudden quake. I take her hand and give it a gentle squeeze, which seems to help calm her, followed by a slow nod.

　　"You were expecting this, weren`t you?"

　　I nod. "We should hurry."

　　"You have a plan?"

　　"I do. And, I made sure to purchase a few healing salves this morning before breakfast. I don`t think we`ll need them, but it won`t hurt to have them on hand."

　　"Glad to hear I was finally able to get through to you. Anyway, lead the way, O` Wise One."

　　I can`t say I`m the biggest fan of her sarcastic quip, but her mood is a lot cheerier despite the air of tension permeating the town. The townsfolk are going about their daily lives, the stores are still open and kids frolic about, but there are ominous murmurs throughout, concerns about the first quake and what caused it.

　　As we head toward the south, near where we first entered Rotini, another, slightly more intense quake rattles the town. The first quake was little more than an omen of things to come, but the second is intense enough that a few chunks of brick and mud are jostled off the sides of some of the older buildings in the area, sending townsfolk hiding under trees, wagons, and other sturdier implements.

　　"Where are we going?" Sammy asks. "We`re not just leaving town, are we?"

　　"Of course not. I`m crude, but I try not to be a total asshole." Most of the time. Besides, this is a big, tangible step toward finding at least the first star shard, and the goddess isn`t going to be too happy if I deliberately forsake the plot. Bending it a bit seems to work, but I`m not keen on snapping it in two& for now.

　　"Sammy, I didn`t want to bring this up so you didn`t have to dread it all night like I have. But brace yourself, it`s going to be a smelly trip."

　　"What do you mean, Ash? Oh, don`t-"

　　I find the access point to the sewers. The knobs are a bit rusted and it doesn`t seem to want to come free, but with my newfound strength, I eventually manage to dislodge the jammed hinge and open the tunnel. It`s dark down there, and an indescribably rancid odor like the worst public toilets back on Earth greets me alongside a gust of wind as the tremors subside.

　　"If you need to take a moment to steel yourself, now`s the time,` I say. "The source of those tremors is down here. And I`d like your help, Sammy,"

　　"Oh, no. Oh, no no no no no!" Sammy shouts. "This has got to be some sick joke. You`re not seriously going down there. Are you?"

　　By this point, I`m already halfway down the ladder, only my hand peeking above the ground. I wave to Sammy as I continue my descent.

　　"Brace yourself, and your nose too! It`s gonna be a smelly one!"

　　In truth, no matter how many times I`ve played this game, nothing could have adequately prepared me for the acrid stenches burrowing into my nostrils. Thank the goddess that the smell-o-vision prototypes sometimes bandied about never came to fruition - I don`t think I`d ever be able to play this game again if I had to deal with the combination of feces, rotting food and carcasses, swarming vermin, and other such pleasantries I dare not try to describe.

　　I touch down on a small patch of concrete that seems not covered in too much filth, and Sammy follows a moment later with a small light on her staff and a scowl on her face.

　　"You knew, didn`t you, Ash? You knew from the beginning we`d have to do this! Answer me!"

　　"I did. And I wanted you to get a restful night`s sleep and have a pleasant breakfast rather than despairing about this. Trust me, Sammy, if I had told you last night that we were headed for the sewers today, you would have spent all night tossing and turning in anxiety, and the last thing I`d want is for you to be fatigued as well."

　　"Ash, because I know you`re right, I`m going to forgive you. This time." I don`t need to see her face to see the vitriol oozing off it, though I`m thankful no slaps are incoming. She wouldn`t be able to do serious damage to me, but I`d still like to keep my health at maximum.

　　I get my first good look around. Somehow, it`s even more rancid than it was portrayed in-game. No signs of anything lurching in the shadows as I lead the way. Though, I know they`re out there, waiting. Even without my outside knowledge, the hairs standing up on my arm and the back of my neck tell me everything I need to know.

　　We continue on through the labyrinthine passages. Sammy can just barely walk upright, while I`m stuck with bent gait, trying to avoid my hair brushing against the sides of this rat-infested maze. We do our best to avoid piles of waste and other such splash damage creeping in through the various pipes en route to everyone`s favorite obstacle - a goddess-damned switch puzzle.This tale has been unlawfully lifted without the author`s consent. Report any appearances on Amazon.

　　The pipes give way to a large chamber, probably as large as a basketball stadium, though with a fairly low ceiling, though finally one tall enough that I can stand straight for a change. The only thing straight about me, for sure. Though, no more time for crude jokes - they are here. Six skeletons, each a bit shorter than Sammy. A faint, sickly glow emanates off their ebon bones, illuminating the rudimentary mace of bone covered in spines and other sharp implements each of them wield.

　　I draw my Shining Blade, and true to its name, it emits a bright, yellow-white glow, one full of vigor in contrast to the sickly yellow-orange of these undead abominations. I smile - it`s time to test out my new technique.

　　I take a step in front of Sammy, nodding gently. "Back me up if it looks like I need it, but give me some space - I don`t want this attack to accidentally graze you."

　　"New sword?" she asks.

　　"Better suited for purging the undead." I focus my fighting spirit, intensifying my new weapon`s glow, and spin like a shot putter as I pull my blade inward, then launch it outward with a single powerful swing.

　　The blade spins in midair like a floating buzzsaw, a shining disc illuminating the sewers surrounding as it chops through bone and lingering sinew. Sworderang - exactly what it sounds like. Not an ideal technique for one-on-one combat as it does leave me temporarily weaponless if dodged. But it`s a great technique for clearing out mobs, and the wide area-of-effect makes it useful when surrounded. If I`d had it when fighting the armor knights yesterday, it would have been so much easier.

　　All save one of them have been pulverized, their constituent bones ground to dust now soiling our shoes, while the last remains, clinging to undeath and hobbling toward Sammy with its club raised and its good leg hobbling it along. Sammy raises her staff to block the incoming assault, though my blade has only just returned to my hand and I won`t reach her in time.

　　"Heal it!" I say.

　　"But-"

　　"Hurry! Just trust me!"

　　With a solemn stare on her face, she glows in a blue-white light that seems to descend from on high, and with a flick of her wrist, the glowing cylinder subsumes the final skeleton in its light, searing its bones into ash, then the ash into nonexistence just as the club is about to make contact with Sammy`s face. With a relieved sigh, Sammy drops to her knees. A little loss of mana, but thankfully both of us emerged unscathed.

　　Experience: 8667

　　To Next: 83

　　Experience: 8589

　　To Next: 161

　　Ashley Lancaster

　　Level 13

　　Samantha Relford

　　Level 13

　　HP:

　　878 / 878

　　HP:

　　634 / 634

　　MP:

　　111 / 135

　　MP:

　　182 / 189

　　"How did you know that would work?" Sammy asks.

　　"It`s just one of those things I picked up in my travels." Mostly a lie, though it was the sort of thing anyone even remotely familiar with these sorts of games would know. Undead were sickly abominations of antilife, and as such, they were inversely affected by healing magic, potions, and so forth. Naturally, Light element weaponry was also a known weakness.

　　"I see. I`ll keep that in mind the next time I see anything undead. Now, do you happen to have any preternatural knowledge on how to get through this?"

　　I nod and turn toward the central device, which manipulates the series of gates and sluices in the sewer. There`s a single dial, with settings from 0 to VI. I suppose there`s some in-universe reason for only allowing us to close a single gate at a time, though in reality, it`s really just a way for the game designers to pad content and generally be a giant bag of dicks. I turn the dial to IV, and after a moment of gears grinding and the screech of metal pounding my ear drums, the gate to the center-right of the panel slowly descends, its metal frame slicing through the musty, fetid aqueduct like a guillotine.

　　Water - I refuse to call it what it really is to preserve my sanity - gurgles and swishes about as its flow is disrupted, funneling instead through the remaining channels, and as it does, the water level in channel IV gradually lowers until only a few puddles remain in the waterway. I slowly walk along the raised side until I find a set of stairs descending into the sluice interior.

　　"Oh my goddess, Ash! You`re not going down there! That`s not a question - that`s an order! I absolutely will not have my&"

　　"Your what?"

　　"Nope, no! You are not going down there!"

　　Right on cue, the ground shakes yet again, this time sending large chunks of stone hurtling toward the ground. One piece lands in the drink, sending foul liquid splashing toward Sammy. She backs up, only to trip over a clump of rock. Thankfully, I`m able to run over and catch her before she tumbles to the ground.

　　And even in these dim, fetid sewers, her face is still gorgeous, a beacon of light which repels all manner of fatigue and despair, one which might`ve launched ten thousand ships in another time and place. We stare at each other, our eyes turning to one another`s, but the roar of a monster pulls us back into the present.

　　"The cause of the earthquakes?" Sammy asks.

　　"Yes. And it will keep rampaging until the entire town is reduced to rubble. Or until we put it out of our misery once and for all."

　　"What is it?"

　　"Do you want to know?"

　　Sammy turns to the side and glares at me. "I forgave you for the last time. But you`re going to tell me. Now."

　　"You wouldn`t happen to be afraid of snakes, would you?"

　　"That roar wasn`t a snake. Snakes hiss, not roar, Ash. I told you, I want to know and I expect you to tell me!"

　　"I wasn`t lying, Sammy. We`re going to be fighting a giant undead snake. I suggest you mentally prepare yourself for when we reach the center of these sewers."