Sammy and I sprint onward through the streets of Rigatoni. It`s gotten quiet - most of the townsfolk have evacuated, hidden, or been incapacitated by this point, and only the occasional rumble of footsteps and whispered shuddering fills the ominous silence taking over the town. Blocks of stone and mortar line the once clean streets - the handiwork of the other trolls. Sadly, unlike the ones back home, these aren`t going to go crawling back in their mother`s basement if I ignore them for a few days.

　　"Are you okay?" I ask Sammy.

　　"Never better!" I`m not quite sure whether I believe her, but I choose not to press the issue.

　　Our first obstacle emerges with a large chunk of meat in its hand, and I try not to imagine where its fleshy snack came from. This one is a deep maroon, with no less rank a stench emanating from any number of crevices upon which I dare not dwell for the sake of my sanity. It grins, a vile, toothy grin, chunks of meat still wedged in-between discolored and cavity-ridden fangs as its eyes turn from me to Sammy, and back to me.

　　"Alright, Sammy. I`ll take the lead. Just like last time, be ready with fire magic as soon as our unwelcome guest starts to keel over. I`ll cover you!"

　　"As long as cover me` doesn`t mean sit back and intentionally get the crap pummeled out of you by Mr. Tall, Rank, and Fugly over there!`"

　　"Ew, gross! And no, I`m not going to start grinding in the middle of a miniboss fight!"

　　"Grinding? That`s absolutely disgusting, Ash! Just-"

　　I sigh. I might have been a ViewTube streamer in my previous life, but I wasn`t creating that kind of content! Note to self - try to avoid any unnecessary innuendos around Sammy. At least until we have a better relationship going. But enough planning my flirting - the troll approaches, though its attacks seem a bit slower than the last. Probably the result of my increased agility since the last battle, as I see no reason for this cretin to be any weaker than the previous.

　　It is, however, considerably more aggressive than the first one - I already know infinitely more about troll anatomy and physiology than I ever wanted, and I speculate it has something to do with the spattering of dried blood upon my clothing. Some sort of chemical pheromone identifying me as a threat, or perhaps an innate behavior to assert dominance against others of its own kind?

　　"Whatever," I mutter. Too many questions that don`t need answers, and I have a new skill to test. Gathering my fighting spirit into the hilt of my blade, I leap forward and, with a frigid swing, launch a crescent-shaped disc of energy toward the troll. It stares for a moment, trying to figure out what I`ve done, before it decides to bat the attack away with a backhanded fist. At the very least, it tries - my attack hits home, severing the fingers off the troll`s right hand to its surprise and my delight.

　　I don`t let my delight cloud my judgement, using the opening from my previous attack to charge forward - these bastards still have their healing factor to contend with. My attack strikes true, the troll collapses to its knees, and I deliver the coup de gr鈉e. As Sammy cauterizes its wounds to negate its regeneration, I grow a bit worried. These fights are going a bit too easily - the trolls are the game`s first series of minibosses, so they aren`t designed to be overly difficult. But in my playthroughs, they generally need a good seven or eight hits before they succumb. Is it just because of this sword?

　　I can think about it later - there`s two more assholes that need a trip to the grave, and I`d rather not have too many unnecessary civilian casualties on my conscience. I motion to Sammy and we start to take off, but a loud thump behind me freezes me in my tracks. Behind me, just beside the troll`s corpse, a red chest standing up to my thighs has materialized.

　　I stop and open my loot - our loot, I quickly correct as I open the chest. A staff about as long as my blade, with a ruby a bit smaller than my fist serving as its magical focus. Fortune has smiled upon me - this is a 3% drop if I remember my tables correctly, and with no benefit to me, I toss it to Sammy

　　Ruby Rod

　　Attack + 35, Magic + 20

　　Increases Fire Element Damage +20%

　　These are purchasable in the next town, Rotini, but it`s still a great find and saves 1000 dols that I`d rather not spend if I can instead put it toward item crafting when we get to the capital of Ravioli. It takes a couple moments to explain to Sammy how to equip it and move her Plain Rod to inventory, but after she finally groks the explanation, we head off toward our next foe.

　　Unauthorized duplication: this tale has been taken without consent. Report sightings.

　　"Ash, there`s something that`s bothering me."

　　I nod, inviting her to continue.

　　"After we took care of that troll, that chest just materialized out of nowhere. But you didn`t seem fazed in the slightest. What`s with that?"

　　"It`s- It`s just the nature of being an adventurer. That sort of thing happens all the time!" I feel a sweatdrop beading down my neck and congratulate myself on coming up with a plausible explanation in short order. "Just wait until we start exploring dungeons. You`ll find these chests scattered all about dungeons. And sometimes they have really powerful artifacts, the kind you can`t make or buy anywhere else." Definitely true of the bonus dungeons, a bit of an exaggeration in the main story.

　　"We`re going to start exploring dungeons? I knew you were crazy, Ash, but heading into a deathtrap like that? Maybe I should have waited until I found someone a bit more sensible to leave with."

　　"Ow, Sammy! That hurts!" I suppose even many travelers don`t go dungeon-diving on a regular basis. I have little choice in the matter, though - I`m the heroine, and my journey will take me to the far corners of the planet Elzabore to find the shattered star shards. Or die trying - this journey could only cost me my life, and I got my second one for free!

　　My musing is cut off when we encounter Tweedle Dum and Tweedle Dumber. Though, I have to give them some credit - joining forces against their would-be assailants after their two comrades went on to a better place? Scratch that; they`re definitely rotting in hell now.

　　I force myself to concentrate on something other than sarcastic quips as the two assholes double-team me. And no, not in that way - my desire to avoid innuendo is only making this worse! Still, with the experience and stat gains from the previous two fights, this fight won`t be any more taxing than the last one. I hope.

　　The two launch punches from either side of me - their attacks are poorly coordinated, but it serves to my detriment as I have a hard time figuring out exactly how they plan to move about. Unfortunately, their haphazard coordination and the fact that there are two of them makes it a lot harder to find openings - every time I think I`m getting into a rhythm, I have to micro-adjust due to some twist to their movement. And, though I`m loath to admit it, these dimwits are pushing me back, bit by bit. Each of them is only a bit stronger than the two previous trolls, but together, they`re posing a real threat. No wonder it was four individual fights in the game!

　　It`s not a pretty idea, and I`m going to feel it in the morning, but one comes to me as I shove a strawberry down my throat. The healing is nice, but the temporary reprieve from the sickening aroma of fungus, shit, and the goddess only knows what else is a true godsend. If I can`t make an opening with parries and dodges, I`ll just have to go for a mutual strike and thin the numbers. I should be bulky enough at this point to take at least one direct hit, even with my armor` being little more than a light tunic. Add that to the clothes shopping` trip.

　　I spit. Time to see if that defense training earlier paid off. The first smell factory punches toward me, and with a leap, I land on its fist, using the momentum from its flail to jump high into the air. The second troll lunges toward me, and though I`m able to block its attack and force my way through, I leave myself completely vulnerable to the first troll`s punch. It briefly knocks the wind out of me, stunning me on the ground, but with Sammy already catching on and scorching the incapacitated one`s remains, at least the hard part of the fight should be over.

　　"Yowch!" I yell as I struggle to pull myself to. It takes a lot less effort than I anticipated, when it hits me. Unlike back on Earth, video game characters don`t gradually weaken, instead maintaining full strength until the moment of incapacitation. Some more recent games introduced some mechanics to try to address that, but those were all well after the release of LSO. So here I am with a huge oozing wound in my gut, down to fifteen percent health, but I should be able to finish this last troll off without too much trouble.

　　I munch on a strawberry and feel my wounds closing slightly, and for a moment, I wonder if maybe life here isn`t quite so bad. I mean, I miss my viewers and my parents, at least a little bit, but at least I don`t have to worry about getting bankrupted by medical expenses. Never thought the saying an apple a day keeps the doctor away` could be so literal, but here I am.

　　"Triple Firebolt!" I have no time to react before three orbs of flame dance around me and pelt the troll`s putrid hide. It`s burning, wailing in pain, and I briefly consider letting it suffer a bit more, but the villagers have suffered even more and the sooner this crisis is over, the better. With their well-being in mind, I decapitate the kneeling troll in a single hit before dropping to a knee, the weight of my pain taking me as the battle concludes and my fatigue grips me.

　　The last thing I see is Sammy rushing toward me, cradling me in her arms and crying out for help. Truly, with her luscious golden locks and that sweet voice, I`m in the arms of an angel, being beckoned back to another stay in the DMV after my second death. But not a moment later, I find yet another strawberry shoved down my throat, and my lightheadedness, the gentle embrace of death, subsides as I`m dragged back to the present. I still have hardly the strength to cling to consciousness, let alone move, but the fact that Sammy`s breasts are right above me does provide a powerful incentive to fight off the twin horsemen of fatigue and injury and stay awake.

　　By this point, the acute threat to the town has subsided; the guards are giving an all clear and the people are emerging from their hiding places, shaken, and with plenty of property damage to go around, but thankfully minimal loss of life. I believe there were twenty-seven injured and seventeen dead in the game. Still too many for my taste - it`s one thing when it`s a bunch of pixels, zeroes and ones, electrons given physical shape. But now these are real, living, breathing people with real families and friends, and my sword is the one that might deliver this world to salvation - or ruin. There`s a lot on my mind, too much to process, and before all that, there`s still rooting out the troll infestation.

　　But even before that, I need a full night`s sleep. Thankfully, Sammy is a true angel, in spirit if not form, as she helps me limp back to our hotel room. All we can do for now is wait for the next chapter of this story to unfold, and prepare for when it does.

　　Experience: 1587

　　To Next: 643

　　Experience: 1509

　　To Next: 21

　　Ashley Winchester

　　Level 8

　　Samantha Relford

　　Level 7

　　HP

　　76 / 543

　　HP:

　　366 / 366

　　MP

　　32 / 82

　　MP:

　　11 / 109